FREEDOM FROM SUFFERING

Whenever I am unhappy it is  because  my awareness  has drifted  away from the present moment, into the past,  overthinking, usually about  the future…  

Addicition is  a complex, a cluster of mental health behavioural problems and a social  disconnection from oneself, family, peers and community.

I am  in longterm abstinence based recovery. My early days/months and years  in addiction recovery were a mix of awe, cofusion, calm, peace and free floating anxiety.

The first time I went deep into  the 12step with a  sponsor I learned about denial:  obsessive thinking,  compulsivity,  impulse control,   boundaries,  perfectionism, and shame. The mask of hubris. And an overwhelming fear of living and dying…

Fortunately,  recovery communities  are an unlimited source  for “life beyond the meetings.” Abundant supportive suggestions for holistic therapists, workshops, events  specific to  shame, attachment and trauma.  changed …so

In the  treatment of  complex addiction away from stigma, alientation and isolation  to  biopsychosocial holistic  approach, and actively engage in the global recovery communities.

My perspective and compassionate approach to treating addiction  is to  engage  clients clients in a regime of holistic therapies that will inspire them, encourage them have their voice, self stress with confidence, calmness  for them to  thrive, maintain a momentum of motivational change and transformation.

I began retraining in global addiction healthcare  in 1989 by volunteering for a year   at the Manhattan Centre for Living – founded by Louise Hay and Marianne Williamson, in 1991 I returned to  home to London and Kent to trains in addiction therapy.

The Manhattan for Living Centre was a healing hub for people who were dying from aids and proved nurturing of the mind, body and soul. From nutritional meals, and holistic treatments, followed by monthly  talks and events  with Louise Hay and Marianne Williams.  I learnt to be a buddy, who never said goodbye, we said  “see you”…and the seeds for living in the solution were firmly planted.

An invitation to experience a  puja  at the Upper West Side  Vedanta Society in 1988 began the quest to heal existential angst. A new Vedanta retreat in the majestic Hudson Valley had just been completed in the spring of 1989 and I went to my first introduction to a meditation retreat.

Over the years,  I have had the privilege of meditating with His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Amma, Lama Yeshe, and Dadi Jenki,  one to one and with thousands to instil  a sense of quietude…

I continue to use  a mantra Lama Yeshe gave me in 1993  to attune, and rebalance the mind and body connection…

1998 – my life changed again, my quest to live conciously  took me even deeper into “my new life” when   I heard about the  Indian mystic,  Meher Baba,  who stopped speaking, and remained silent for many years, and was inspired  to visit to his ashram in India.

A quantum huge leap into the unknown…India’s enriched  cultures, mythology and deity devotion was daunting…however the moment I landed, my soul knew I  had come home…

Meeting with Meher Baba’s  extraordinary mandali, pilgrims and people who had dedicated their lives to to living in this extraordinary commmunity captivated my spirit…unbounded  love and devotion for God..

As happens, I after a few at home in the wild west, I felt compelled to leave my “airbrushed-life” the illusory pursuit of  perfect love and happiness  that continued to elude me…and  to live amongst the rural  villagers nearby  the ashram for a year…

Talking less, keeping quiet is still a hallenge, I have learnt to love the easing into the stillness…… I use  my breath to bring my mind back to the moment..

Because if I don’t I am at my worst when I am stressed, anxious and  triggered:  mentally, physically and emotionally I feel as though  I have no boundary,  energetically  separating,  you from me…

A few sacred rituals connect me back to my essential being: four simple things: I get enough sleep, I exercise, I meditate and eat 90% organic, mostly  home made,  healthy food. I call these rituals, routines, actions and tasks  my pathways  to peace mind, inner  calm and outer happiness…

I love sleeping,  our bedroom is a sanctuary.  No devices, a night light to read myself to sleep, a humidifier with essential calming oils, and a beautiful  ever changing  window to the world at night,  a constant symphony -like flow of clouds passing through the universe…

Winter 2018: my  cooking  hero is Yotam Ottolenghi…go to:  https//linktr.ee/ottolenghi for  “food everything” recipes, spices/pantry/hampers and gifts..fabulous!

I love planning, prepping, cooking food made with love, for my family. I “just do it” to get on the mat  every morning, 15 minutes of core.mund and body strengthening ..and I am a constant meditator…throughout the day  to “be in flow” and observe from a distance, the world racing by me…

NOW is  the most important time in my life… to  thrive, feel safe,  let-go all the while   striving with self-forgiveness and compassion for when I over react, overthink, over-due, over-commit and  fail @  being  my best, doing my my best for me and you…

I  love the silence, the nothingness of doing nothing… easing into   beautiful  possibilities  of non-attachment… to anything…

My message to you is simple: YOU ARE ENOUGH.

I am enough.

I am not alone.

I have everything I need in this moment.

“Ahum Prema” is Sanskrit:”I am love”

I AM.

….Detaching from the madness:

Essential   “noise cancelling ear phones” ensure my “bubble” is protected from the chaos of Londoners on the move…and so perfect for listening to  432 ‘LOVE” from  divine Soul Medicine….and when I feel at my edge time switch to  fabulous, powerful vocals and lyrics…

My current theme song is:

‘SHALLOW”

A Star Is Born Soundtrack Soundtrack.

Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper

[Verse 1: Bradley Cooper]
Tell me somethin’, girl
Are you happy in this modern world?
Or do you need more?
Is there somethin’ else you’re searchin’ for?

[Refrain: Bradley Cooper]
I’m fallin’
In all the good times
I find myself longing for change
And in the bad times, I fear myself

[Verse 2: Lady Gaga]
Tell me something, boy
Aren’t you tired tryin’ to fill that void?
Or do you need more?
Ain’t it hard keepin’ it so hardcore?

[Refrain: Lady Gaga]
I’m falling
In all the good times
I find myself longing for change
And, in the bad times, I fear myself

[Chorus: Lady Gaga]
I’m off the deep end, watch as I dive in
I’ll never meet the ground
Crash through the surface where they can’t hurt us
We’re far from the shallow now